Bruchko: Who is My God?

Anna Hemphill

Bruce Olson's experience as a kid of finding out who his God was touched me profoundly. He asked the same questions I think most of us ask when we're searching for spiritual guidance.
Who is my God?
Why was I born?
Who is my God?
Where is He?
And for Bruce, like most Christians:
How is Jesus going to save me? And from what? Was He going to do some miracle?
Just believe? Shouldn't I do something great?
Could Jesus change these things (the bad things inside me)?

I remember feeling really lonely in high school. I didn't have any friends - I had drifted away from childhood friendships when they started going to field parties and sleeping with guys. I spent my weekends with my family; and though I love my family and am thankful for the relationship I have with them, I still wanted more - a keener sense of belonging. I did an independent study the fall of my senior year in high school in which I studied the life of St. Therese of Lisieux - The Little Flower. She is a beautiful saint who died at a young age. She was totally devoted to Jesus and loved Him with the innocent spirit of a child. But even she had doubts and confusions. That semester I felt the walls of my high school coming in on me. I wanted more than the mundane life of Rockbridge County and the near-sighted goals of everyone around me. I wanted more than what this world could offer - I wanted a life with Jesus. I grew up actively believing in Him, walking in faith. But as I prepared to leave home and go to college I realized the power He has over me, and like Bruce on his bed as a child, I realized who God is for me personally. I depend on Jesus for everything, and like Bruce, too, I am sometimes frightened. But mostly there is peace. And wonderful things can happen in that peace.